Drum Roll Please....

And now, without further ado, I shall announce to you the reception hall that has been chosen. If anyone is confused about what I am referring to, please read my previous blog. 

Hall 2 is the winner! We all (my Mom, Dad, future Mother-in-Law and I) arrived to the Hall 2 this afternoon and happened to be one of the first guests to arrive at the bridal show. My Dad asked immediately if the hall had been reserved for October 24. A young woman looked at their calendar and on the date the words "Reserved" had been written. She asked him to wait as she double-checked with the men who handled the hall reseravations. A man joined us and informed us that the date was reserved under the name of "Stang". Now, I called Hall 2 several weeks ago inquiring about the availability of the hall. The gentleman I spoke with had asked me for my name. At that time I was not sure why, but, obviously, a miscommunication happened. As soon as I heard "Stang", I knew that they had simply spelled my name wrong when they had written down that I was interested in reserving the hall.

So,  I had reserved the hall and was not even aware of it. That was the first bonus at the bridal extravaganza. The second one was the special discount that they were offering that day. If you placed your deposit on the hall that afternoon, you would receive one hundred dollars off! Fantastic! Also, the soda bar price was half-off! Excellent! Saving money all around! That is what I call a good day.

Without hesitation, we placed a deposit on the hall. Although this would seem to everyone to be a joyous thing considering a decision had finally been made, it was a bittersweet event. Remember, we had booked Hall 1 already. Now that Hall 2 was booked we needed to tell Hall 1 that we were no longer holding our party there. Hall 1 had a table set up at the bridal show that afternoon. My Mom sauntered over the table with future Mom-in-Law and I in tow (Mom needed moral support). She explained to the two girls at the Hall 1 table our situation. Thankfully, the ladies were totally understanding and said that there should be no problem with cancelling the date at Hall 1. Phew! No angry words or nasty faces as I had expected. Ok, so I have an overactive imagination...so what?

Now that we had discussed the issue with Hall 1, my Dad was volunteered to find our caterer (who is, ironically, directly connected with Hall 1) and explain to him that we still want their services for the day! Did I mention how fun it was to plan a wedding? My dad found Mr. Caterer and again told our epic story. He, too, was perfectly fine with our cancelling the hall and even told us that the down payment we had placed on Hall 1 could be used to pay for the catering services that day! Oh, HAPPY DAYS!

All in all, I am very happy about Hall 2 being our reception site. God was gracious and blessed me and my family in so many ways today. My Mommy can be at ease now and I will be happy knowing that she will be comfortable on my wedding day. She was never being a monster about the situation, she just wanted me to have the best place possible for my special day. And to tell the truth, I am happier with Hall 2 than I am with Hall 1. Little things makes it ideal. For example, Hall 2 is on a hill. I have always wanted to be married on a hill and this kind of compensates that dream. Also, I will not have to decorate as much to make the place look nice. It is already beautiful, no help is needed. So, I would like to thank my Mommy and God for helping me pick the perfect place for my wedding day. I love them both very much and always will!

This or That

I have yet to see the fun part of wedding planning. Planning my wedding is not nearly as fun as I had hoped it would be. All of the choices that need to be made are numerous and difficult.

So far, the biggest battle of planning wedding day has been picking out a recption hall. We do, in fact, have a place booked (it shall be dubbed Hall 1), but my poor Mommy is not happy with it. She believes that the place is too dirty and the floors are too old. She is worried that our guests will feel uncomfortable because she is. Now, as for the bride , I love the place. There are quite a few windows and the room is arranged in such a way that everyone can see the dance floor; two very important things to me. My Mom does not think, however, that these things are important in the grand scheme of things. It is going to be October after all, and the windows really will not make much of a difference. Eh, what do I know?

Now, the place my Mom likes,which from now on shall be called Hall 2, we saw several months ago. The only thing that is stopping me from truly falling in love with the place is the memory of my fiancee's reaction when he saw. Now I know his sour and unconvinced face was caused by the advertised prices of the caterers (which, consequentally, has been resolved and is no longer an issue). While, I know deep in my heart that Dominick was only concerned with the price of the caterers, that unhappy face still sticks in my mind when I think of Hall 2. 

Now, do not mistake me, it is a gorgeous hall. They just remodeled the place and put lots of money into it. But, it is almost too fancy for me. I am a plain person. Ornamented things make me feel awkward and uncomfortable. Also, there are no windows and the dance floor is practically a separate room. One cannot see the dancers from the oppostie ends of the main area of the hall. Now, my concerns are not a big deal or even legitimate, but I cannot help it. 

After many discussions with Mom and long, tedious bouts of contemplation, I have decided that I really do not mind where we have our reception. I have almost made up my mind that having atreception at Hall 2 is the wiser choice. However, because of other circumstancecs, which I will not detail here, my Mother does not wish to book Hall 2 until this Sunday at a bridal show. I am prone to stress easily and the fact that we cannot book Hall 2 is causing my stress-level to go up. I called Hall 2 a few weeks ago and they informed me that our date, October 24, is still open, BUT by the time we make a decision I am so afraid that the hall is going to be booked. And then I will suffer a long duration of regret and sadness. But do not fear, I know that God is going to take care of this day and no matter where we have it, Hall 1 or Hall 2, I know it will be a day that I will always look back on with fond memories.

This small tale has a word of wisdom for all future brides out there in blog-world: do not rush into making major decisions for wedding day. We booked Hall 1 on a whim. I liked the place and that was it. I did not take the time to seriously, calmly and rationally talk with my Mom about the pros and CONS . Becuase of that, my poor parents have put a down payment on a place we may not have our reception at. The feeling I am left with is guilt. I know my parents do not mind and all they want is to prepare a wedding day that will make everyone happy and comfortable, but it still bothers me. So, please, take the time to discuss major decisions with a couple people instead of making them on your own. 

I will report which hall has been definitely picked in the near future. In the mean time, do not worry yourselves with the decision I am facing (wink, wink). Hall 1 or Hall 2? Hall 1 or Hall 2? Excuse me as I go beat my head against a wall. 

Future Guesses

Today I completed my first observation of the many to follow this semester. I always enjoy observations. It is fun to be in a classroom and simply try to hide in the back corner. I do not need to get involved in the class activities, just sit back and scrutinize the teacher. I really suggest everyone to try it sometime. 

Even though observations are supposed to give one an idea of what it is like to be a teacher, I fear that it does not even come close. We only see what is presented to the class that day. We do not see the teacher preparing the lesson, grading homework, filling out various reports on individual students and all of the education that had to be completed before being Pennsylvania certified. When I observe I always get excited about the possiblity of being a high-school teacher. Then I stop and reflect on all the dirty work involved with teaching and I quickly get discouraged. I do not handle stress well and I think whithin the first week of being a teacher I would lose all my hair due to the ferocious pulling of it. 

It is comforting to know that my Heavenly Father knows what I will be doing in my future. I do not recall if I mentioned the options rolling around in my head as of now, but I will mention them again anyway! Of course we have the possibility of being a secondary English teacher. Exciting, yet exhuasting. Then there is the possibility of being a library scientist. Although this sounds tantalizing to all you readers (do not lie, I can tell),  I really have no idea what being a library scientist entails. None. Next option, a guidance counsellor. That is another profession that Iam  completely ignorant of. Also, there is substitute teaching. Now, talk about exciting! I would never know what awaits me in my day. Although, that does sound to me to be very stressful. Choice bajillion, speech and language pathologist. We had a guest speaker come to my Introduction to Special Education class last semester and it sounded like such a rewarding job. 

I know that every person undergoes this major decision at least once in their lifetime. I know that some even go through this journey of identity many times whether he/she be young or old. I know I have already changed my major twice and it will probably change again sometime in the future. I just have to keep on reminding myself that God has been with me in my past, He is with me in the present, and He will be with me in the future. It is a good thing He knows what is going on becuase if He did not...I would be doomed. In fact, we all would.

Failure

So, it has been officially a zillion years since I have posted. "That is impossible", you may say, but I feel like it has been. Life got a little crazy (as usual) and so my blogging got placed on the back-burner. Oh, well. What do you expect from me anyway?

I do not even know what to say now. I have not really been inspired to blog anything consequential as of late, so I guess I shall blabber on and hope something understandable forms out of these words.

It has struck me how quickly life changes. The old saying goes, "If you want to make God laugh, make plans". It is true. Dominick and I were set on getting married in May of 2010. The date has now officially been moved up to October 24, 2009. I once told myself I would only be married in the Spring. I am most definitely going to be hitched in the Fall. I am not complaining, I just find it amusing that what I once thought was never going to change has.

Other plans that have changed. Well, as of now further education has been put on hold. Getting married in the fall, yeah, no way I can do school and work full time. Dominick has just discovered that his education is going to be pretty expensive. Can't afford me going to school as well. Ah, what are you going to do?

Even if I do go back to school, it won't be for Secondary Education. I no longer have the desire to go to work and come home with more work. I want to be able to go to a job and leave work at work. I don't know if this is actually possible, but I am hoping in my naivete.

Well, life will continue bringing its surprises. And I will continue to go with the flow. What can you do? Nothing. And I am ok with that. I know that my Savior knows exactly where my life will go and that is a comfort to me. Well, I will try my hardest to keep this blog updated. Don't count on it or anything becuase you will, without a doubt, be met with grave and utter disappointment. I am a failure at blogging...

Far, Far Away

I want to go someplace far away from here. Someplace warm. Where the sun shines brightly. Puffy clouds floating lazily by. The grass is lush and vibrantly green. Soft. Soft enough that I can lie on it without my skin itching. Daisies. Gerbera daisies. The colors shocking. Pink, purple, yellow and orange. So many that one cannot possibly take it all in. With me, I would have a book in hand. A good book. Plugged in my ears would be the earphones from my IPod. With all kinds of relaxing music. Leona Naess, Sixpence None the Richer, Dave Matthews Band, David Crowder Band. All that mellow music. Me, my book, soft music, the warm sun, colorful flowers and the soft grass. That is all. No people, no noise, no problems. Just me and my book. Far, far away.

Why the Hate?

As is common knowledge (or at least I think...?), I am taking an Introduction to Philsophy course at NCC this semester. I cannot express how glad I am that I only have to sit through two more class discussions. We are now discussing the topic "Philosophy of Religion". The first day of class while reviewing the syllabus I noticed this topic was scheduled and immediately I felt sick. I knew I would be hearing some mind-boggling opinions kids of my generation had about God. And indeed, my high hopes were met.

Today, was especially interesting and equally frustrating. The beginning of the class people did not have much to say about God being our intelligent designer. He wanted us to disprove a philosopher's theory who said this world being created without an intelligent designer does not make sense. I had nothing to say and I am glad no one else did either. He then entered another branch dealing of the philosophy of religion. We began to discuss the ontological (an account of being) theory of God. A follower of this theory was St. Anselm, a major theologian. His essay in our textbook dealt with his rebuttal tactic for theists debating with atheists about God.

Our professor asked the class to give some reasons as to why someone would not believe in God. One girl gave a cliche response, "I can't see him how do I know he is there?" As I sat in my chair, grinding my teeth, all I could keep on thinking was how stupid that reason is! I mean, seriously? What about gravity, air. Can anyone out there "see" that? No. But, we hold onto its existence for our existence. Why is it so hard for people to get that? No, we don't see God, but oh, how we all need Him like the air! Even now, I have that burning feeling in the pit of my stomach. I just want to get up, scream and say, "OPEN YOUR EYES! WHY CAN'T YOU LET HIM LOVE YOU?! ALL OF THE ANSWERS YOU LOOKING FOR ARE RIGHT THERE!"

My favorite response of the day, though, came from a young gentleman. His apology on God was this: Let us suppose that predestination exists. God plans a person's life from the day he/she is born until the day he/she dies. If this is the case, God makes a person kill another person. So, doesn't that make God a murderer? If a person cannot control his/her life, everything done is God's fault.
I must give the guy credit for creativity. It is a sick, disgusted, perverted creativity, but an interesting thought nonetheless. Very original. When I heard that, though, my heart sunk. He said it with such firmness, bitterness and conviction, I cannot comprehend how someone could hate the God I love so much. I mean honestly, what has God ever done to these people?

What is even worse about all of this is I sit in my chair silent. My professor is looking for us to bring up topics that do not deal with God's goodness or love. He just wants us to prove that it is a necessity to have an Intelligent Designer. That is it. I sit in my seat wanting to yell and scream at these people, but cannot. For me, I love my God becaise of His kindness and goodness. Do not get me wrong, I do believe that this world does not make sense without a Creator. I mean seriously, everything in existence would have to be a pretty fantastic accident. Like my professor said, if this world was an accident, there should be no continuity among species. None.

When I hear these kind of upsetting statements or comments in class, I have to write little prayers or poems in my notebook to vent out those intense emotions I experience. Otherwise, I would be creating a ruckus and not demonstrating self-control as I walked around to each person smacking them upside the head. Here is what jumbled off of my pen today:
I sit in your world,
I feel your pain.
Oh, those words that pain.
Worse
Than the stab of a sword.
The nausea,
The knots,
I can't believe
My ears.
God,
Your beautiful creation
Hates who you are.
God,
Your beautiful creation
Wants to live on their own.
Rescue their souls.
Save their lives.
Touch them.
Be real to them.
Oh, God
Your beautiful creation.

Please, pray for my class. Pray for my professor. Pray for me. I hope I am presented with a good opportunity to talk about my God before class is over. An opportunity when I am level headed and able to control those feelings of anger and disappointment.

Christmas Time is Here

Today I am going Christmas shopping! I actually began yesterday at an old book store and I got some awesome presents that I am super excited about. But, today I am actually going Christmas shopping. I am going with the complete intention of looking for people on my great big list! I am so excited.

I love Christmas. It has always been my favorite. The music, the atmosphere, the shopping. It is just fun all the way around! But what I like most about it is that our people are forced to remember and acknowledge the Christ child. People are made to recognize the wonderful thing Jesus Christ did for us, for everyone. I do not think everyone does, in fact I know they do not. The commericial aspect of Christmas does drown the important things out. However, it is easier for me to remain hopeful. It is Christmas time after all!